Thursday, December 15, 2011


  I just learned that I’m not speaking to someone.  That’s news to me.  An acquaintance of mine told me that a friend of mine told this acquaintance that I’m not speaking to her. I’m surprised to hear that I’m not speaking to this person when I’ve been communicating with her for months.  Does sending someone an email to wish that person a happy birthday and inviting that same person to various events over the span of several months count as not speaking to someone?  Apparently. 
     I’m so confused.  If I’m not talking to you, why are you writing me back?  And if you’re mad that I’m only emailing you and not calling, maybe you should let me know.  I do know that I keep inviting this person to do things and the response is so luke warm, so unexcited, that making the effort to invite her to do things doesn’t even seem worth it (especially now that I’ve learned that “I’m not talking to her”).  But what do I continue to do?  I continue to invite her to things—hoping against hope that something might spark her interest and want to go do something.  Hey, if your personality is to not get excited, so be it.  But don’t go around telling people that I’m not speaking to you.  And if you’re upset about something, phones and email work both ways, you can initiate a conversation with me.  I'm the only one doing any of the communicating.  
     Ah, maybe what’s going on here is that she told this mutual acquaintance of ours that I’m not speaking to her, but in reality she’s really not speaking to me.  Hey, if you’re not speaking to me, do me the common courtesy of letting me know—by really not speaking to me and by not responding to my emails.  Don’t go airing dirty laundry to people you hardly know and don’t continue to respond to my invitations or well wishes if you don’t want to speak to me—just be silent.  Why respond to me if you don’t want to talk to me?  To be polite?  That’s seems a bit strange.  Not to mention a wasted effort. 
     I’ve truly never experienced this sort of silent treatment—where there’s nothing really silent going on, on either party’s end. 

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